Empty Pitchers




Game Recap: Team Finds Gems at Pitcher's Mound and in Outfield
News, Injuries & Transactions

Standings  (Avg Runs For/Against)
7-0  ( 19 / 5  )    GT Bombers
6-1  ( 16 / 10 )   The Band Aids
4-3  ( 13 / 13 )   Empty Pitchers
4-3  ( 15 / 9 )   Arizona Devils
3-4  ( 11 / 13 )    Plan B
2-5  (  9 / 17 )   FR RamRod
1-6  (  7 / 14 )    Churchill's B'n'S
1-7  (  5 / 16 )    Massage Envy

Playoff Schedule

6pm - Semifinal
(#1) The Band Aids  (16/10)
(#4) Plan B  (11/13)

7pm - Semifinal
(#3) Arizona Devils  (15/9)
(#2) Empty Pitchers  (13/13)

8pm - Championship Game

Arizona Devils

4-3    7pm - Home

AWOL:

Our semifinal game replays a 12-11 EP victory. AZ Devils seems to have hit their stride the past few games, mercy-ruling our friends, Final Round Ram Rod, in the first round.

Notes from our previous game: AZ Devils feature a quick pitching machine with good control. Their SS has good range with a strong yet not always accurate arm. Just ask Melissa's leg. Offensively, a couple of their girls have pull and a couple guys have power to drive the ball. But their men spent the night popping the ball up shallow enough for our infield to record outs.

AZ Devils has a guy with a belly and mustache who crushed one over the fence this past weekend. He'll need to be jammed inside with pitches. The rest of the team should hit catchable flies. Their girls are slow so if OF's quickly hit cutoffs, we should maintain easy forceouts.

Should we win, we will immediately play the championship game after our game at 8pm against the Band-Aid/Plan B winner. Plan B's pitcher, Cory, crushed a RF homerun but can hit all directions while Noel of The Band-Aids should be played every pitch back at the fence.

Final weekend fun - It all begins with the Band-Aids / Plan B rematch at 6pm. Last time Noel took out Lee at 3B. Both teams love all other teams but if each had to admit one team loved slightly less, it would be each other. This small slight of love has forced Benevolent League Emperor Richard King to attend this game. (Editors Note: Originally I used the term "hate" describing the teams' mutual feelings. Lauren of The Band-Aids emailed "The Band-Aids hate no team. We only love." Lee of Plan B several weeks ago already said he's ok with The Band-Aids. Karl Rove forced this editor to use the word "hate".)


Keith fired the cheerleaders one week earlier


Jessica's first dinger




Scott admiring his shot


Which infielder took a hard grounder to the knee?


Rounding third, heading for home?


League Rules for Subs
  • Batters start with 1 ball & 1 strike.

  • Pitches landing on the plate are strikes.

  • First base is twice as big. The runner must step on the orange part, otherwise he/she is out.

  • There are two home plates. To avoid collisions, the catcher stands on the main plate and the baserunner heads to a separate plate to the right. It's a timing play like a play at 1B (no tag). Wrong plate and you're out!

  • There is a line 2/3 of the way towards home. Once you cross that line you cannot turn back.

  • Guys and girls must alternate in the batting order. If a guy is walked he gets two bases, not one.

  • With two outs, after a male batter walks, the next female batter has the option to walk or bat.

  • If we have more guys than girls playing, two guys must alternate in one batting spot.

  • When running to 2B or 3B, you cannot obstruct a fielder from throwing the ball to another base and no crazy movements/sound. Slides that risk injury to the fielder are automatic outs.

  • Outfielders - always throw to 2B and SS cut-offs.

  • Baseline Bar & Grill gives us a 20% discount before and after games.

  • Schedule - All games Tempe Sports Complex southwest field
    Sept 7
    W 18-11
    Final Round Ram Rod
    Gone: Jami (no sub)
    Sept 14
    L 21-10
    GT Bombers
    Gone: Jessica (Casie), Ruthie (Shannon), Andrew (none), Jami (none)
    Sept 21
    W 12-11
    Arizona Devils
    Gone: None
    Sept 28
    W 17-16
    Churchills Bubbles N Squeak
    Gone: Sarah (Casie)
    Oct 5
    W 15-1
    Massage Envy
    Gone: Sarah (Casie), Melissa (Annette), Ted (Kyle)
    Oct 12
    L 11-9
    Plan B by Atomic Pools
    Gone: Sarah (Casie), Jami (Shannon), Ruthie (Amy)
    Oct 19
    L 17-11
    The Band-Aids
    Gone: Sarah (?), Courtney (?), Melissa?
    Playoffs Start
    Oct 26
    W 14-4
    Churchills Bubbles N Squeak
    Gone: Melissa?
    Nov 2
    7 pm
    Arizona Devils
    Gone: None



    Back left-right:    Ted, Keith, Scott, Ryan, Jamie, Melissa, Andrew, Jessica
    Front left-right:    Courtney, Anne Marie, Sarah, Ruthie and Jami

    Season 3 Results
    L 19-5
    The Band-Aids
    W 14-3
    @ Strategic Sluggers
    W 15-5
    @ Jokers Wild
    L 8-7
    Anton Sport
    W 26-1
    @ Los Diablos
    W 19-8
    @ Cytec Patriots
    W 19-7
    Pesto
    Playoff Results
    W 16-4
    Los Diablos
    L 12-5
    Jokers Wild
    Season 4 Results
    L 13-5
    The Band-Aids
    L 9-5
    Sluggers
    W 15-9
    Rounders
    W 13-8
    Final Round RamRod
    L 14-6
    Stingers
    W 23-1
    Jagerbombers
    W 9-0
    Doc & Eddy's
    Playoff Results
    L 11-10
    Doc & Eddy's
    Season 5 Results
    W 18-11
    Final Round RamRod
    L 21-10
    GT Bombers
    W 12-11
    AZ Devils
    W 17-16
    Churchills
    W 15-1
    Massage Envy
    L 11-9
    Plan B
    L 17-11
    Band-Aids
    Playoff Results
    W 14-4
    Churchills

    Mad Libs #1 - Why Ruthie Missed Last Week

    Can you pick the real reason Ruthie missed the game?

    My experience at a Rubber Factory watching football..... Well.... first of all.... who seriously goes to a Rubber Factory for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to the Rubber Factory at noon and did not leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old Doorknob Peckinpaws start buying you limes at noon. I really do not remember watching much football at all. It is really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and lowly grunts all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 hacksaws throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is a Short Sheeter. 8 hours and $0 later... I find myself flimsy and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It is actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.

    My experience at a Children's Hospital watching football..... Well.... first of all.... who seriously goes to a Children's Hospital for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to the Children's Hospital at noon and did not leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old pockets start buying you fudgesickles at noon. I really do not remember watching much football at all. It is really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and ORCHIDS all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 glass eyes throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is a janitor. 8 hours and $215 later... I find myself scruffy and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It is actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.

    My experience at a school watching football..... Well.... first of all.... who seriously goes to a school for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to the school at noon and did not leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old trees start buying you butterflies at noon. I really do not remember watching much football at all. It is really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and STUDENTS all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 dogs throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is a teacher. 8 hours and $1 later... I find myself pretty and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It is actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.

    My experience at my junk watching football..... Well.... first of all.... who seriously goes to my junk for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to my junk at noon and did not leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old Palin brain cells start buying you herpes sores at noon. I really do not remember watching much football at all. It is really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and MCLOVINS all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 gay pandas throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is a sex machine. 8 hours and $1/2 later... I find myself grade A sexified and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It is actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.

    My experience at a retirement home watching football..... Well.... first of all.... who seriously goes to a retirement home for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to the retirement home at noon and did not leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old cats start buying you trucks at noon. I really do not remember watching much football at all. It is really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and GEESE all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 trees throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is a plumber. 8 hours and $19 later... I find myself happy and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It is actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.

    My experience at a strip club watching football.....Well.... First of all.... Who seriously goes to a strip club for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to the bar at noon and didn't leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old men start buying you shots at noon. I really don't remember watching much football at all. Its really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and NAKED GIRLS all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 lap dances throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is the bartender. 8 hours and $6 later... I find myself drunk and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It's actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.

    My experience at a airplane watching football..... Well.... first of all.... who seriously goes to a airplane for 8 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEP!!! Thats right 8 hours!!!!!!!!! I got to the airplane at noon and did not leave til 8:00 P.M. This is what happens when old cups start buying you barf bags at noon. I really do not remember watching much football at all. It is really hard to watch when you have NO sound on the TV... REALLY loud music and PEOPLE all over the place. LOL... I think my friends had 9 papers throughout the day. What a waste of money... I only went there to hang out with my friend who is a wild animal trainer. 8 hours and $12 later... I find myself hot and with no way to get to my softball game at 7:00. I think this is a DAM GOOD EXCUSE!!! It is actually the only excuse that will work from now on if you want to be a TRUE Empty Pitcher. I definitely emptied plenty of pitchers on Sunday.